Adaptation is the Name of Game
As we near the end of 2018, I can honestly say, this year put me to the test. I found myself excited by the evolution of my work and equally frightened that it was all for naught. Without going into a lot of story, there were a number of circumstances that demanded my immediate attention which ultimately affected the flow of my and introduced me to a crossroads, if you will.
I probably don’t have to tell you this, but I resisted the changes being presented. I had devoted many years to develop this practice, and refused to put up with ‘life’ robbing me of my creation. But alas, the more I hung on, the more painful it became.
I first noticed it in the way I was feeling when putting material together .. I was determined a.k.a. desperate to regain my footing. I took steps to accommodate and appeal to people … nothing, and I mean nothing was working. I then decided to share an office with a local colleague. In order to attract interest, I sold myself out offering sliding scale, discounts, pay what you can deals, and even mentioned the fact that I have an NPI number for those with insurance. Without any drama allow me to say that none of it has worked out. In so many words, I was dumbfounded feeling completely stopped by the Universe | God | Source Energy. What the hell was I missing?!
The final straw was when in one day I was accused of not knowing what I was talking about by a person who sells Shaklee. Mind you, it was in reference to a recent video I did on supplements; although, I wasn’t bad mouthing any company .. just pointing out some important facts … and then asked by another if I was credentialed to take insurance yet. This person has the means to pay for my services but prefers somebody else do it. (please forgive me if this seems like a rant .. it’s not really …. it’s just between the two experiences, I found myself at the end of my rope) Not surprisingly, I gracefully defended myself with the first one and told the second person I was still working on it and would let her know. That’s when I walked into the surrounding hills and surrendered and cried … hard! What am I here to do … please tell me ….
Walking back to my house, in the presence of my dogs, I took a moment to get brutally honest with myself. Could I be ok without any of ‘this’? Yes …. Do I need others to accept, understand, and like me? No … I walked home focusing on these very points, only. I took them into my heart and felt it all and realized that I already have everything I need .. I’ve always been taken care of (sometimes miraculously) and as long as I accept, understand and like myself, that’s all I need. Once I owned this in my heart, I explored the next level of truth for me, I realized that my thought process is outside the box and I’m not unwilling to both fly that flag and live it; therefore, the opinions of others really can’t take that away from me. I see things as I do and others have their views. As for the insurance gig? Nah … not interested. I only applied for the NPI because someone told me I could get more business with it …. My original setup with this office was the clients would pay me and then submit for reimbursement and the fact that someone is telling me (essentially) that they'll only come see me when the situation is reverse is BS! I do not want to bill insurance .. I do not want to wait 60 to 90 days to be pain. In fact, I raised my rates in order to cover my rent at the office ……. wtf???? I compromised myself every which way…
What do I mean? Well, because the Amish clients were being ‘pushed’ to the side, I became afraid and began making choices in order to be accepted into the non-Amish culture; however, I know how I want to conduct business and I lost sight of that all because I was terrified that I might fail if I didn’t acquiesce to the wants of others whether that’s saying what they want to hear or adjusting my wants to facilitate theirs.
Truthfully, I think many people face this type of situation which contributes to the scores of disenchantment with life that we see. Nevertheless, there is a ‘bone’ in me that refuses to let this collective mindset win me over … so, I let go of what I thought I should do in order to heartfully create what’s next.
Change is the nature of our existence whether it’s in the plant kingdom, animal kingdom or outer space. It’s fueled by a yet to be identified energy that leads to an infinite number of outcomes. Why infinite? Because every inspired change is interpreted by the receiver albeit genetic receptor or human mind and its these interpretations that generate the outcome; therefore, if we don’t like what we’re experiencing then a shift in our interpretation influences a different result. This holds true with mental, emotional and physical health which is why mindfully including essential oils makes a world of difference in our bodies. They are signaling molecules and when selected with intention and understanding, we can shift the way our system is interpreting the environment.
Having said ALL of this, I am going to close my local practice and stick with online | distance work. I have adjusted my fees to reflect what I can live off of and currently developing products that do not require consults and always bring joy to the heart (see my gallery)