History Only Repeats Itself ... when you allow it ..
As you continue to experience the same thing happening over and over again, consider you are the common denominator in the equation. Years ago, a friend and I came up with the saying: same soup, different bowl.
But how can it be given there are different people and situations involved?
That’s an easy two part answer!
You have a story about you; an interpretation loosely based on your history that you are emotionally attached to. As circumstances unfold, they trigger various emotions and it’s your reactions to these emotions that generate the patterns you see. This may not happen at first. Yet with time and settling in, everyone eases into their ways which is when you notice
scene 1, take 5begin to emerge.These are opportunities to heal … to awaken to your truth. Even when you’re observing large scale problems. If you see it and it triggers a reaction within you, that’s your cue to wake up to you!
I know, number 2 sounds a bit cliché and it’s an honest assessment of what’s required if we don’t want history to repeat itself.
Each of us has an inner voice that we deny.
As a child, I knew I didn’t want my experience of being an adult woman to look like that of the women in my family … shushed, teased, and held back. I was driven, loved contributing, enjoyed taking the lead, and had an insatiable curiosity about life. I remember this as if it were yesterday.
When I was a very young girl, we lived in a brownstone where I visited the upstairs neighbor as often as I could; with my mother’s permission of course. I’m told that my reason for wanting to go up there was to touch her.
I also recall having to spend a good portion of my time sitting and playing quietly. Yet years later when my mother was asked, ‘what shows up when Tammy walks into a room?’
Her response was, ‘a need for attention.’
My reactions was, ‘Whoa, REALLY?’
The stories I created about myself were based on an interpretation I made up around family member’s expectations which were, without question, rooted in their history and the beliefs that guided and raised them. This is how history repeats itself ..
Can you imagine how such thoughts as ‘I am too much’ and ‘I don’t matter’ not only ran my life but showed up when facing a trigger? Yet, even though this was an every day experience, I was completely unaware of the beliefs running my show. I simply thought that every shitty time was because of one more awful person.
That’s right, I said it .. everyone else was to blame. That is until I realized I was the common denominator in every one of my own experiences.
Throughout most of my adult life, I had the recurring thought, history doesn’t have to repeat itself. Without any explanation, this made sense to me, yet when I said it out loud, I was often met with the biggest scoff because there is plenty of evidence to show that it does...
Well … just because it does doesn’t mean it has to …
We are the creators of everything we experience which isn’t the easiest fact to accept about life. A more common thought is life happens … to us.
Nope. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Life is energy and even though you question your abilities, you’re far more powerful than you want to believe. Take that in. You are far more powerful than you are giving yourself credit for!
Everything you experience is mirroring the energy you’re putting off. Energy encompasses thoughts and your emotional reactions to them, beliefs and the actions taken.
Triggers / stressors are just a fact of life. Therefore, how you respond to these facets of life fashion the results you face. This is how history repeats itself.
work / business related
relationships
physical / mental health
group efforts
and beyond
The most difficult challenge is accepting our responsibility in any of this. And by responsibility, I am inserting and asserting your ability, not disability. When you and I accept our responsibility for everything we experience, we are owning our place in that moment. It has nothing to do with blame or judgment.
Check this out:
“Responsibility begins with the willingness to take the stand that one is cause in the matter of one’s life. It is a declaration not an assertion, that is, it is a context from which one chooses to live. Responsibility is not burden, fault, praise, blame, credit, shame or guilt. In responsibility, there is no evaluation of good or bad, right or wrong. There is simply what’s so, and the stand you choose to take on what’s so. Being responsible starts with the willingness to deal with a situation from the view of life that you are the generator of what you do, what you have and what you are. That is not the truth. It is a place to stand. No one can make you responsible, nor can you impose responsibility on another. It is a grace you give yourself – an empowering context that leaves you with a say in the matter of life.” -
Werner Erhard
There is a lot of peace in this statement, even when it comes to health issues or anything beyond our obvious control. Yet for the sake of this post, because this topic gets deep, let’s focus on health, beginning with mine.
So, as mentioned, ‘I’m too much’ and ‘I don’t matter’ were two of the beliefs I formed around the experiences I had growing up. But it didn’t stop there. Eventually, I picked up such thoughts as, ‘I don’t deserve’, ‘I’m not good enough’ as well as ‘I am powerless’. Please keep in mind, it took a few years of life before I unearthed these and other gems. However, once I identified these underlying judgments, I was in a better position to take notice of which beliefs and reactions my choices were aligned with. This is the true meaning of integrity!
To be whole and complete within myself conveys I am honoring my truth … what is so for me!
How did I determine the disempowering thoughts?
attention to the way I felt about myself when something wasn’t going well
intent on breaking free from the vicious cycle of drama
breathing room to love on myself when those feelings and interpretation of self came to light
a lot of essential oils! look, I was conditioned to react a certain way. The muscle of self-deprecation was rather strong and the use of various essential oils not only eased the angst, they helped me to digest and assimilate life in a positive way which of course, improved the way my body settled into a more anti-inflammatory state.
The truth is I have a tendency to rip and run through life, so the slowing down part was quite a challenge for me, yet, hastiness was my enemy. Well, not really an enemy .. it was more like a shield that did more damage than good. It kept me wrapped up in the emotional upheaval of my inner world, blaming everything and everyone for the countless setbacks and breakdowns.
However, an initial shift happened when I first read Mr. Erhard’s thoughts on responsibility. I believe Neale Donald Walsch even writes about the choice to be at cause or at the effect of your life. Clearly, I had been living at the effect of everything happening to me. Yet to be the cause of my life … whoa! That was the expansive and empowering concept I needed to hear.
Once I let those ideas sink in, every shitstorm became an invitation for change … within me.
If I could create this without thinking about it, imagine what I can generate when I put my mind to it?
Keep in mind, I had been living under the umbrella of victim for a few decades which set me up for a number of health issues. Not because my body or your body is weak and defective. On the contrary, you’re reading this which means you are above ground. Therefore, your body is working really hard to keep you there. Again, you may not like what’s happened or happening to your body and honestly, I understand. However, there is a history in your genes that extends much further than your time on earth.
There is a growing body of evidence indicating that information about our lineage is housed in the DNA along with all the genetic changes that occurred over time. Between generations of genetic and behavioral information coming forward and our individual interpretations of the world, the human body is on high alert making it susceptible to many breakdowns.
Here’s some food for thought. The stress response is just a chemical reaction. It represents the system shifting gears from thriving to survival mode. In other words, the body is in direct communication with everything from the inside out. Nature is designed to rewire itself … also known as adapt according to the organisms needs. As long as you and I continue to react emotionally to circumstances, events and people, the longer the body remains on high alert, altering the types of hormones being produced and influencing immune activity. However, the longer this goes on, the more inflammation is produced, leading to systemic breakdown, making it harder to keep you safe.
Partner with your body
Remember, stressful situations trigger disconnection .. look how easy it is for a child to lose sight of who they really are through his or her interpretations of their life experiences.
Illness is simply indicating a disconnect between mind and body.
Shifting the way you think and emote are absolutely critical to slowing this activity down, yet after centuries of stressors imprinted on your genes such as calamities, maladies, emotional distress and the over consumption of chemicals albeit manmade or natural … the cells of your body require extra tender loving assistance.
It would be an honor to speak with you regarding this topic …